Feeling REALLY Alive: Why Summer Seduces, Tantalizes And Intoxicates

Something magical happens at this time of year.  The morning breeze whispers the promise of longer and brighter days, seducing us with their radiant glory and enticing us to shed our winter layers and come out to play. If winter is our jailer, imprisoning us in the coziness of our homes, then summer is the rebellious inmate who finds a clandestine way to set us free. Even the most well-behaved prisoner who has become resigned to his fate will struggle with the temptation summer proffers. Liberation and summer go hand in hand. The two glide together on a motorbike fuelled by adrenalin, whizzing down open country lanes and  with the wind whipping at loose hair.  As the warmer days heat our mind, our body and our souls, we acquire a certain lightness and  have a new spring in a step. Like sunflowers, our faces are upturned to receive a kiss of vitality that only the sun can bestow.

The sense of liberation started when I was a child. Summer holidays were eons filled with carelessness and frivolity. Each fiery sunset melted into a fresh new day, though no particular day stood out from the rest. Time was a blurry concept, starting out as something whole, but later melting like the sweet vanilla ice-cream trickling down the cone and onto my fingers. I had no concept of past, nor of any particular future. Life was all that was unfolding at that very moment, and I was quite sure that I would be young forever.

That is the summer paradox: on the one had the continual days of sunshine lull you into a false sense of eternity, yet on the other hand we are victims to the short night that tantalize with their brevity. This is why summer is so intoxicating. We yearn to get our fill, desperate to cling onto these fleeting moments of perfection.  We often live out our teenage summers in a wild, unbridled euphoria. Hormones and heat provide a heady catalyst from which unfurls an inexplicable desire to experiment with alcohol and the opposite sex.

Summer. You provided the most wonderful backdrop to many a love story. The short and intense variety. Long and languid days full of fraught desire, culminating in a thunderstorm when all passion was unleashed. The love would last until the autumn leaves fell, yet I could not see beyond those glorious days. The most vivid of all my memories can be found, etched in the  albums of my mind. The times when I have felt so wonderfully alive. The time when I knew I could never die.

Why not create a little summer in our lives, whenever we choose?

 

 

 

Nostalgia: When To Wear The Rose-Tinted Glasses

 

Stories.

Our lives are filled with stories. We watch films and we read books. We listen to the tales of friends, family and acquaintances; stories of lives filled with love, loss and everything in between. We crave the words of others, in our attempt to make sense of life and situate ourself on the map of human experience. We hear stories in music, we see stories in photographs and art and we feel stories through the emotion of people around us. Tales are the invisible currency of human relationships.

Though we have a need for the stories of the people around us, we have a greater necessity to tell ourselves our very own tale. We do this to create a sense of identity and to get a deeper understanding of ourselves, our values and our priorities. Subconsciously, we create an invisible scrapbook of memories. We have a particular filing system for these memories; people and life events that touch us deeply are usually memories that we glue tightly into our scrapbooks. No matter how many times we open the book, these pictures will never fall. Memories that do not move us quite so profoundly are the ones that are simply placed inside the book. With the passing of time, it is likely that these souvenirs may fall and be lost forever. There is a third classification in our memory scrapbook; the bad times that weigh heavily on our emotions. Though we may not want to guard these memories at all, they become stuck at the back of the book. Most of the time we will choose to open other pages, yet there will be times when a playful wind blows through the open window, flicking the unsuspecting scrapbook onto the back page. We may be forced to revisit this episode of out lives, before quickly flicking back to the front of the book.

Life is about the acquisition of good memories with which wel fill our personal scrapbooks. Like any good story, there will be highs and lows, yet ultimately we will create our happy ending. The great thing about having this kind of book, is that we can delve into it at any time and relive any moment of our life. However, before we open such a book, we almost always do something special; we put on a pair of rose-tinted glasses. These glasses serve to embellish the story, the words and images take on a softer and sweeter hue when seen through these lenses. Whilst the good times become even greater in our mind, the bad times tend to lose their power. The passage of time has worked its magic and has taken away the acuteness of our vision. When we see these images from the past, they are softer and less clearly defined. Our vision is no longer struck by their sharp, jagged edges, so we are not affected in the same way.

Reminiscing in going back to a ‘safe’ place. It can offer us a certain escape from the present moment; a time in which uncertainty can fill us with fear. As we know the outcome to all that happened in the past, there is comfort in travelling back; a little like watching a much-loved film over and over again. However, we must be mindful that whilst it’s natural to relive all the wonderful memories we have had and to learn from our previous experience, we must busy ourselves collecting new memories to fill our scrapbooks. As we are the authour of this work, we alone choose what should go inside. Nobody will ever be able to judge this choice, for nobody will have ever lived the same experience.

So please go out into the world and collect your clippings. Create beautiful books to be proud of. Flick through them as you please, relishing all the fun you’ve ever had and knowing that the blank pages ahead can surpass all expectations.

 

 

 

The Joy Of Writing In The Rain

Writing In The Rain

I’ve waited all day to write this post. This has been a whimsical decision on my part, for in reality the computer keys could have had their workout much earlier. However, I’d seen the weather forecast and I saw it was going to rain. As rain is an infrequent occurrence here in Spain, this natural phenomenon has become something phenomenal in my mind and I actually look forward to it. I feel it’s very conducive to imagination, creativity and good writing. Let me explain myself.

Rain is hypnotic; as I’m writing, the drops are falling in perfect synchrony with the tapping of the keys. I’m lulled into a wonderful state of deep relaxation and I feel totally liberated in my thinking. Outside the world is black; the only sign that I have of any existence other that my own is the tip-tapping of the apologetic raindrops as they fall self-consciously onto my window. As I could imagine the world is just my own, anything can be. This is enormously helpful to the imagination.

Rain also heightens my emotions; perhaps due to the metaphorical use of rain and storms to depict sadness, loneliness or conflict. I therefore feel particularly sensitive and know this is a good time to explore the inner feelings of my characters. I also love adding rain into scenes to create a romantic atmosphere, a time in which characters are at one with their emotions. It is often useful in moments of self-reflection. Storms serve as the perfect backdrop to dramatic revelations; intense conflict and turning points in characters’ lives. I have enjoyed creating some of the most passionate scenes in my writing with a stormy backdrop, a time in which all desire comes to a head and the heavens literally open! This physical and emotional release is very well depicted by a storm.

Rain doesn’t always have to veer towards the melancholic. Often times have I used the rain to conjure the jovial delight that can be found in this element. A sudden rainstorm can represent surprise, rejuvenation or a refreshing start. It can depict renewal; washing away of the old to bring in the new.

As I sit here tonight, I contemplate how rain so often takes on the emotional significance we choose to give it. What is certain, however, is the extraordinary beauty of something so very ordinary in our lives. Imagine if we choose to see everything in this way. Life is so marvellous, let’s put it down in words and immortalize these moments.

 

 

 

 

Eternal Spring In The Optimistic Mind

 

I’d forgotten about these kinds of days; the days that just sneak up on you, tapping you on the shoulder like an old friend and taking you by pleasant surprise. The days when the sun streams tantalizingly through an open window and a light breeze whispers the onset of spring, willing you to come out to play. You cannot resist, the idea of leaving the house without the woolly armour that winter has required is just too enticing. Shedding layers of clothes seems to free up the spirit, you can see it in the cheerful gait of all the people whose paths you cross. On days like these, you don’t even need a destination; as is the case with life, the journey itself is reward enough. The pleasure of feeling the first warming rays of sun on the skin, imbuing you with vitality and the promise of all that is just about to be. How I love days like these. Days that are unexpected and so fill us with a heightened sense of gratitude, as we had no expectations to disappoint. We all go back to being children on these days; we just want to play on the street, to roam and to feel wonderfully free. Our bodies visibly relax in the heat, we are no longer hunched in the thick dark winter uniform that has been our winter attire. We suddenly become sociable creatures, daring to look others in the eye, firing flirtatious winks here, secret smiles there. Everything seems possible in this season, anything can be born in springtime. Life is poised on a moment of perfection.

 

We all know how wonderful this time of year can be, due to the sunshine, the warmer temperatures and the longer days. We know how optimistic this makes us feel. Yet what if we could always create springtime in our mind? What if we could always reproduce these wonderful feelings? What if we could always feel that something wonderful was just about to happen?What if our mood didn’t depend on external circumstances, if not our mind? I’ll let you into a little secret. WE control our mood. WE control our minds. If we choose to be optimistic, we will live in eternal springtime. Unlike the passing of the seasons, this is very much within our control and please remember, optimism is not a predetermined given, it is an attitude and a learned habit. Best of all, it’s never too late to learn. I choose eternal spring.

 

 

 

 

Your 80th Birthday Party: Finding Answers To The Future In The Present

Sometimes we feel lost in the present moment, floating in a sea of seemingly infinite possibilities and unsure as to which coastline we have to reach. We ask ourselves if we should be swimming accompanied or alone, whether we should follow those that have gone before us or else find our own way. There are moments in life when we ultimately question who we are, what our journey is and who are fellow voyagers will be. We live our lives grappling with the knowledge that a severe storm could attack at any time, and we could sink or swim in the wake of this, depending both on our vulnerability and our luck. Therefore we know that we have to enjoy floating in the cool and calm waters whilst ever we can.

 

Let’s get back to dry land for a moment. If you’re having doubts as to where your life is going (and I’m quite sure that everybody has these days) I’d like you to fast-forward significantly. Let’s say to your 80^th birthday. We are going to trace the life we would like, but starting from the end. By deciding the outcome of our lives, will have some goals in mind. Without knowing what these goals were, it would be impossible to reach them. In order to define the kind of life you would like to lead (and it is never to late to establish this) I ask you to establish a celebratory speech made by a loved one at your 80^th birthday party. That’s right, you are going to be the one blowing out all the candles, gleefully high on sugar and basking in the warmth and love of this special moment. I would like you to write this speech. Imagine what you would like to hear said about your life and the way you have chosen to live it. In order to write this speech, try asking yourself the following questions.

 

1. What has made me unique and has set me apart from other people?
2. Which aspects of my personality are the ones that other people have admired?
3. How have I used those special traits to serve the world in some way?
4. What kind of relationship with family and friends have I nurtured? Have I managed to maintain special bonds with loved-ones?
5. What has my professional trajectory been? Have I used my passion and my talents to the benefit of myself and those around me?
6. Have I loved and been loved?
7. What will I be remembered for?
8. How have I made this world a slightly better place?

 

By projecting ourselves into the future, we’re able to imagine looking back and reflecting on our lives. In this way, we can begin to make sense of our priorities, of what is important to us as individuals. Let’s suppose you have clear answers to these questions. Now it’s time to take small steps on a daily basis, steps that will lead you closer to the person you want to be. With every decision you make, ask yourself if this will take you closer or further away from your dream.

 

It’s a great idea to keep a copy of this speech in a safe place and even to go back to make occasional revisions. Our perspectives may change with experience, though it’s likely that our fundamental values (those of love, respect and so on) will stay the same. You are the only person who can find the meaning of your life and whilst ever you are you are being true to what you believe you will swim freely, regardless of the shore to which you arrive.